Juggling Two Dreams

When I was morbidly obese, the only thing I dreamed about was losing the weight and getting myself healthy so that I could live long enough to see my children grow up. It took a long time for me to believe in myself enough to start working towards that dream, but eventually, I made it come true.


Then I started focusing on other dreams. One of those dreams is to be a published author. While I have had some short stories and some articels for magazines published, I haven't yet finished any of my novels to the point of having them ready for publication.


I am finding that trying to maintain one dream while striving for the other is not a simple matter. Writing is a process that keeps me sitting at my computer for long periods of time. Between that and shuffling my children to and from school, keeping tabs on them while they are home and general household maintenance (cooking and cleaning), fitting my usual two to three hours of exercise into my daily regime is increasingly difficult.


I have learned to try and fit my exercise in early in the morning, and, when that is not possible, right after my youngest children go to bed (7:00pm) which leaves me with some time to write later in the evening. I also get some of my exercise through walking and do a lot of walking while taking my children to and from school.


I am also finding that writing works better when I am not hungry. The temptation, when I am writing, is to snack on junk food. I have been fighting that temptation, and sometimes the temptation wins. I have learned that I need to eat something healthy (such as fruit) before sitting down to write and that I need to make sure to stop, even when my creativity feels like it's on a roll, to have regular, healthy, balanced meals at mealtimes.


Maintaining my weight loss sometimes feels like it is harder work than losing it was but it is worth the effort. I still have more energy than I had when I was overweight, and even my creative ideas seem to flow more easily now. Juggling two dreams isn't easy, but it's worth the effort.



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The Skinny Dreaming Book idea

My newest project is a non-fiction book that is really still in the idea stage right now. It will be written as something to complement this weight loss, fitness and healthy living blog. I will happily take any suggestions anyone would like to leave me on how I should format the thing and on what types of content I should cover. Those of you who regularly read this blog know that it includes my weight loss story, inspirational stories about others' weight losses, informative articles on recent research into health and fitness, tips to aid with weight loss and healthy recipes. Many people have suggested that I write this book, but writing a non-fiction book is a new experience for me, so I think I have been stuck in the planning stage for it for a little too long.

I might start writing it through a series of blog posts here which will be incorporated into the book itself at a later date.

I'm serious about taking any helpful suggestions for it. I would love suggestions!

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Tips for Healthier Take-Aways & Eating Out

Eating at restaurants and having take-aways brought to your home is risky when trying to lose wieght or maintain a healthy lifestyle. Most fast-food, take-aways and restaurants serve very unhealthy, high fat and high calorie food. So what are you to do to make those times when you are going to eat out or order in a healthier option for you?

If you are having a kebab, skip the pitta bread and sauces (add your own, healthier, sauces) and have the whole chicken pieces off the stick, not the ones shaved off the larger piece as that is held together with fat. And eat all of the salad bits that come with it.

If you are having pizza, well, there isn't really much you can do about how bad the pizza places are for you, but you can make sure not to eat more than a couple of slices and not to have any extras with it. And don't allow yourself a stuffed crust either.

If you are eating Chinese, choose boiled rice rather than fried rice. Don't have anything battered, and stay away from heavy sauces. Chicken is probably a safer choice of meat than beef, pork or duck.

If you are eating Indian, again choose boiled rice. Most of the sauces will be bad for you, but you will help yourself by passing on the Naan bread and side dishes. Find out if any of the tomato-based sauces are made without using cream.

If you are having Mexican, remove some of the cheese on your dish, if possible. The dish will taste just as good with half the cheese as it does with all of the cheese, and cheeses used in restaurants tend to be high-fat cheeses. Make sure you have lots of lettuce and tomato with your dish and don't just leave it on your plate. Remember that the shells, whether corn or flour, are not very healthy, so either choose a dish that doesn't use tortilla shells or limit your consumption of them. Taco sauce should be safe to add to your dish.

If you are having Italian, pasta dishes are your safest bet, along with tomato-based sauces. Add some vegetables to your order, but request that they be butter-free. Make sure the dish you choose doesn't require a lot of cheese. and if all else fails, you can have a sald with the dressing on the side.

Your best bet, if you are craving kebabs, pizza, Chinese, Indian, Italian or Mexican food, is to make it yourself. There are a multitude of healthy recipes that will satisfy these cravings (some of them on my Skinny Dreaming Recipes site).

Just make sure that you do not eat out or order in very often, and you should be okay with whatever you choose to eat. One night of eating restaurant food can ruin an entire week's work of eating healthy, so, while you don't have to eliminate it from your eating completely, limiting your eating-out and take-aways is the best plan.


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I Will Be on Sky News Tonight at 5:00pm!

Me with Mostyn Price, the Senior Cameraman for Sky News, West of England Bureau and Isabel Webster, the West of England Correspondent for Sky News

Obesity during pregnancy has been in the news quite a lot lately, especially now that the NHS is trying to take steps to help prevent the complications that obesity in pregnancy can cause, such as large birth weight babies.

Because of the NHS' latest move, giving obese pregnant women diabetes medicine even when they have yet to test positive for gestational diabetes as a way to prevent overly large babies, Sky News decided to do a feature on it, and Slimming World let them know about me, because I lost a lot of my weight while I was pregnant.

I don't know how much of what they filmed will actually be shown, but they interviewed me with some questions. Then they filmed me cutting up fruit for the kids and handing out fruit to the kids. (The kids included some of the neighbors' children as well.) Then they asked us all to play games outside, and the kids chose "Duck, Duck, Goose." If they show it, you will see my 17 and 18 year old daughters as well as me, a 40 year old woman, playing "Duck, Duck, Goose" with a bunch of younger children (mine and the neighbors' kids). I am laughing just thinking about it!

The kids were fascinated with the news van, especially when the film taken was being sent to headquarters so the big satellite dish on the top of the van adjusted to angle skyward.

It is supposed to air during the 5:00pm news and possibly again during the 10:00pm news.

Both Isabel and Mostyn were really nice. I just hope I don't look like an idiot on film!

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Split Into Many Fragments

I have so many things I am trying to achieve right now, so many dreams I'm aiming towards. Sometimes I think that maybe I am taking on too much. As those of you who have been reading my posts will know, I am working toward my dream of being a published author. I am taking lots of steps towards that dream. One step is that I am writing and submitting a short story every month. I am working on finishing and editing my three NaNoWriMo novels. Another step is that I am reading eveything I can get my hands on about the craft of writing so I can work on honing my skills. I have also joined the 12 x 12 in 2012 picture book challenge, just finished the Picture Book Marathon and have started a challenge of my own with the Chapter Book Challenge. (I am finding published chapter book authors to guest post and share their wisdom with the others who have joined the challenge. The challenge is to write a children's chapter book during the month of March.) I am trying to keep up with writing in my blogs as well.

Now, it stands to reason that with so much going on, some things are going to get less attention. I am still doing my daily exercise. I am usually watching what I eat and trying to eat healthy, but I must admit that, on my tired days, I don't do as well or make the best choices. And my blog posts are happening less and less frequently.

I keep reminding myself that I lost over 145 pounds, and that, if I managed that, I can manage anything, but that's where I seem to be finding difficulty. I did manage that, but at the time I was being so successful at losing the weight, I wasn't concentrating on much more than my family and my weight loss.

At this moment in time, I am working on so many different projects while still trying to maintain my weight loss and spending time with my family, and sometimes it feels like I might have taken on too much. I feel like I am being pulled in too many directions and each thing that is calling to me is pulling a piece of me towards it until I am splitting apart in many separate fragments.

And this long-winded post is my way of saying that I am sorry that I am not posting as frequently right now as I used to. I will try and create thoughtful and helpful posts every weekend though because I have no intention of abandoning this blog. This is the first of my blogs that I really put any effort into, and it's kind of like one of my babies. Blogging here not only helped me to lose weight, it also helped re-spark my interest in writing again.

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Kick Self-Doubt to the Curb

As some of you know, I am pursuing my dream of being a writer. Before I lost the huge amount of excess weight I carried, I didn't have enough confidence in myself to even attempt to do anything with my writing. I never shared it with anyone.

Now that I have managed to achieve what some people saw as impossible (losing over 145 lbs), I realize that if there is any goal that I set my mind on, as long as I am willing to work for it, I can achieve it.

But knowing this intellectually doesn't mean that it is always a constant knowledge within me emotionally. Self-Doubt, nasty as she can be, still creeps up on me.

I recently started sharing some of my writing. I have entered some of it into competitions and even shared some of it on my writing blog. My first writing submission resulted in a rejection. And it stung. Even though I know that some of the writing I was up against was excellent and even though I know it's never personal, it still stung. Self-Doubt reared her head again. With some effort, I managed to slam her back down with a well-aimed kick by submitting more of my writing to other places.

(I don't normally advocate violence, but I have to admit that kicking out at Self-Doubt feels really good!)


Even more recently, I shared some of my writing on my writing blog as a way of entering some stories into small, friendly competitions. I don't think I will feel bad if I don't win. But knowing that others are out there reading my writing, possibly even judging my writing, makes me nervous. Self-Doubt keeps rearing her head up again, and my kicks seem to be getting weaker.

I got a few nice comments, and even though I got a lovely warm feeling when I first read them, Self-Doubt had me rethinking it and wondering if they were just being nice. Then I wonder, what is wrong with me that I can't just take a compliment at face value?


I bet you are wondering what all of this has to do with your efforts to lose weight (or achieve other goals for yourself). I'm getting there; just keep reading.

The thing is, I am learning from these constant attacks from Self-Doubt and from each time I kick her back down again. I'm learning what it takes to defeat her. And in whatever you are trying to achieve, whether it's a writing goal, a goal to lose weight or even something completely different like being your town's best archer, Self-Doubt will try to get in your way of achieving your goal. You will, at times, think, I can't do this, I'm not strong enough, or I'm not good enough. (Nasty sentences, aren't they?)

But the truth is that you can do it. You are strong enough and you are good enough. You just have to believe it.

The way that I am finding works the best at fighting Self-Doubt is simple: just ignore her. Keep striving to achieve your goals. Don't give up. Every time you take another step toward your goal, despite Self-Doubt staring you in the face, you are kicking Self-Doubt to the curb. And every time you stand up to Self-Doubt in that way, she grows weaker and you grow stronger.
So don't give up. Keep reaching for your dreams. You'll get there.

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It's Always Worth It

I know many people who have lost weight and then gained it back again, or who have given up on themselves ever losing the weight long before they ever reach their goal. And every time I see it happen, it saddens me.

I am not judging anyone who does this. I have done this in the past myself. (I once lost 50 pounds on Weight Watcher's over a 6 month period and then gave up and gained it all back and more.) Fortunately, the last time I decided to lose weight, I was able to stick with it until I reached my goal weight and then I have hung on to this weight loss ever since.

It's not easy. I know some of you might think that it gets easier once you reach your target weight, but it doesn't. Maintenance isn't any easier than losing weight. In fact, in some ways it is harder. When you no longer have to face poor health and being unhappy with your size, gaining a little bit of weight back doesn't seem like that big of a deal. But that little bit of weight can easily snowball into a much larger weight gain.

I know that there are times when all of the hard work doesn't seem worth it. Sometimes, it just seems like you are giving up too much or having to work too hard to reach your goal. Sometimes, having that huge slice of frosted cake seems more worthwhile than sticking to your healthy eating plan.

And maybe you get to a point where you decide that it's not worth it because you will never be strong enough or stick with it long enough to reach your goal. Maybe you can't really picture yourself slim and healthy, living a healthy lifestyle. Maybe it is easier to give up on yourself.

But it is worth the hard work. It is worth the sacrifice. It is worth the effort and the struggle and the good choices. Because you are worth it. you deserve to be healthy, fit and confident. you will gain so much more from sticking with your healthy lifestyle than you will lose from sticking with it. You will gain yourself back.

You don't need to hide yourself behind a layer of unnecessary fat. You don't need to eat sugar and fat and junk to feel good about yourself. Besides, when has eating junk food ever helped you feel good about yourself for longer than it takes to eat the junk food?

I have reached my goal weight and I've stayed at this weight for around two years. And I am telling you that it is worth it. Believing in yourself is worth it. Making the right choices for yourself is worth it. Not giving in to temptation is worth it. Keep struggling, keep fighting and keep reaching, because it is worth every second of the effort to reach your dreams!

Don't give up. It's worth it, even though it sometimes seems hard. It does take work and dedication. But it's worth it.

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Four Simple Steps to Achieve Your Goals in 2012

Christmas, and the usual Christmas indulgences, have passed by now, and the new year is almost upon us. Whether you ate healthily over the holidays or over-indulged, chances are, you are looking at the approaching 2012 and deciding on what you want from the new year ahead.

Are you going to wait until Januaury 1st to begin trying to reach those goals? Or, instead of procrastinating, are you going to start aiming for those goals now?

Achieving you goals takes just four simple steps.

1 - Decide what you want to achieve in 2012.

2 - Now make a list of what steps you need to take to achieve those goals.

3 - Start taking those steps now.

4 - Continue taking the steps it takes to achieve your goals.

Simple, right?

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Healthy Ideas For Fun & Gift-Giving For The Holidays

I wrote this last year and it was originally published in the December 2010 issue of Bevery Hills Child Magazine.



The coming holiday season doesn't have to mean gaining weight for you or your family. Here are some easy ways to make your holidays healthier and to show your children how to have a fun and healthy time while celebrating without adding any additional calories and fat to your daily life.

1. Make cookies and cakes healthier. Baking cookies and cakes for the holidays is seen as a holiday tradition for most people. An easy way to make healthier versions of cakes and cookies is to eliminate the oil and butter used in most recipes and replace them with yogurt. You can also replace sugar with sweetener.

Here’s a recipe for Snickerdoodle Balls that kids will love making. They will love the mixing and kneading it takes to make these cinnamon flavoured treats!

Snickerdoodle Balls

Ingredients

6oz self-raising flour
3oz low-fat margarine
12 tbsp sweetener
1 tsp vanilla extract
3 tbsp fat-free vanilla yogurt
1 tbsp ground cinnamon
1 egg yolk

Directions

-Preheat the oven to 350F.

-Mix the sweetener, flour and cinnamon in a bowl. Add the margarine and rub it in using your fingertips until the mixture looks like breadcrumbs.

-Stir in the yogurt and the egg yolk. Knead the mixture with your hands until it forms a soft dough.

-Divide the mixture into 24 small balls. Place the dough balls on a baking tray sprayed with Pam or other low calorie oil spray. Bake these in the oven for 12 to 15 minutes, or until golden. Cool before serving.

2. Make cracker and cream cheese houses. Instead of the traditional gingerbread houses, get out some square crackers, and let children use fat-free cream cheese to stick them together, building a house. Cut up carrots and bell peppers for your children to use to decorate their houses.

3. Make “snow sleds” out of cardboard boxes. You only need a cardboard box and some paints for this craft. Your child will love painting the cardboard box to turn it into their pretend sled.

4. Make pick-a-gift jars. Your child can recycle glass jars and paint them with festive colors and pictures. Let your child write down, on colorful pieces of paper, things he will do as gifts, such as mowing the lawn, walking the dog, washing the car, drawing a picture, etc. Fill the jar with these “gifts”, and whomever he chooses to give this gift to can choose one for your child to do until the choices run out. Just make sure the “gifts” your child lists in the jar are age appropriate.

5. Make meringue Christmas trees. Here’s where a little sugar can go a long way. These meringues do not hold a lot of calories as they are very small, and you can make them healthier by using sweetener in pace of sugar in the recipe.

Christmas Tree Meringues

Ingredients

3 large eggs, whites only
2 ½oz powdered sugar
3 ½oz caster sugar or 3 ½ oz sweetener
green food coloring

Directions

-Preheat the oven to 260F Fan.

- Mix together caster sugar and icing sugar/sweetener.

-Put 3 large eggs whites in a clean bowl, add a few drops of green food coloring and whisk until the mixture forms stiff glossy peaks.

-Add the sugar mixture, one spoonful at a time, whisking until stiff again between each addition.

-Spoon the mixture into a freezer bag and snip the corner and make a hole. Line the baking tray with wax paper and pipe out the meringue to make blobs that get narrower as they go up with the peaks at the top.

-Decorate the meringue tree with silver balls all over it.

6. Serve up a healthy lasagna. This is great because you can make several of these, your child can have fun helping you layer the ingredients, and the lasagne can be frozen to be cooked whenever it is needed. Use disposable foil pans. Let your child join you as you take a lasagna to someone you know could use the helping hand for the holidays this year.

7. Volunteer. Volunteering, and not only letting your child see you volunteering, but letting your child volunteer too, is a great way to teach good values to your child. You can volunteer with your child at a soup kitchen or a food bank. You can help wrap gifts for one of the many charities that deliver toys to children in need over the holidays. There are many ways that you and your child can volunteer and help make the world a little brighter for someone else during this holiday season.

8. Make colourful paper chains and Christmas bows out of ribbon to decorate around the house. Your child will have fun being creative with these kids of simple projects. Let her decide where to decorate.





You can even make tiny bell ornaments out of egg cartons, pipe ceaners, paint and bells. Just cut the bumps out of the egg cartons, poke a hole through the top of each one, and, using pipe cleaners, create loops through the “bells” to hang them from your Christmas tree, sliding jingle bells through the loops on the inside of the egg carton “bells.” Your child can make these or you can make them and your child can paint and decorate them.

9. Make do-it-yourself healthy trail mix snacks. Use granola, raisins, yogurt covered dried strawberries, whole grain Cheerios, mini (unsalted) pretzels and cashews or peanuts. Put everything out and give your child a small sandwich bag. Let your child choose which of the ingredients he wishes to add to his bag and then he can shake it all up inside the bag. Then he can either eat it or tie a ribbon around it to give as a gift.








10. Make your own ornaments out of homemade clay using cookie cutters and acrylic paints. You can make homemade clay using flour, salt and water. Roll it out until it is about ½ inch thick. Get out cookie cutters, preferably Christmas-themed, and your child can cut make as many as they can fit onto the surface. Using a sharp pencil, poke a small hole through the top of each one. Once these are done baking until they are hardened, paint them all white on both sides using white acrylic paint. When the paint dries, your child can use different colors of acrylic paints to make each ornament colourful and unique. When the ornaments are dried, put a tiny ribbon or string through the holes in the top of each one and tie it into a loop. Now the ornaments are ready to either be hung on the tree or to be wrapped as presents.

Salt Clay

Ingredients

2 cups plain flour
1 cup salt
1 to 1 ½ cups cold water
2 tbsp vegetable oil

Directions

-Stir ingredients together. Knead it together well until it forms a soft ball.

-Cut out the cookie shapes.

-Bake in the oven at 300F for an hour or until hard.

Whatever you choose to do for the holidays, just remember that the holidays can be fun and healthy for you and your children. Happy holidays!



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What Does It Take?

What it takes to live a healthy lifestyle:

1. Making the right food choices and sometimes saying "no" to something you want.

2. Giving up an hour or so of your day to commit to exercise.


What it takes to continue living an unhealthy lifestyle:

1. Living with health related illesses (if not now, then later), such as diabetes, heart disease, high blood pressure, asthma and more.

2. Feeling fatigued and having no energy most of the time.

3. Living with physical pain and breathlessness. Being overweight can cause conditions such as plantar fasciitis (chronically inflamed heels), lack of being able to breathe properly when doing simple things like climbing the stairs in your home, sleep apnea (stopping breathing for moments at a time during your sleep which can be potentially very dangerous), and worse.

4. Living with being teased about your weight, your looks or your lack of physical fitness.

5. Low self-esteem. Being overweight can often correspond with a low self-esteem.

6. Living with not being able to fit into your favorite style of clothes or not being able to shop in the regular-sized clothing stores.

7. Having embarrassing moments such as having to ask for seat belt extenders when on a plane or not fitting onto a roller coaster ride or being uncomfortable sitting in a chair that has arms because the arms squeeze into you.

8. Feeling self-conscious when eating in public. Although it is doubtful anyone is sitting in judgment, it is not always the way things play out in our minds.

The list could be longer, but I will stop here. I know which of the lists I prefer. Do you?

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Number One Tip For Making Your Dreams Come True

I once was very overweight. The medical term was "morbidly obese." The term "morbidly" implied that I was putting my life at risk by being as overweight as I was at the time. I had health problems and lived with pain every single day.

I dreamed that I would someday be slim and healthy again. But dreaming about it wasn't enough. Dreaming about it kept my dream off in the distance somewhere as something that would happen someday.

Now my weight puts me in a healthy BMI. I don't have any pain other than the occasional temporary muscle aches from a new form of exercise. And I am wearing clothes that my teenagers fit into. I have been described as "tiny" and "diddy." I have energy and I have my health back. I lost over half my body weight.

So how did I do it? What is the number one tip I can give you for making your dream, whatever that dream might be, come true?

I was persistent. Persistence is the one thing you need to achieve any goal you have set for yourself. How did I do it? I didn't give up. I kept at it. I didn't let anything stand in my way. I made my goal a priority in my life and I worked hard at it.

Some days it was easier than others. On other days, it was a struggle and a battle the entire day. But I never gave up. I was focused and persistent and I never lost sight of what I wanted and of what I needed to do to get it.

Now I am on a different journey. I have a new goal. I want my children's stories and my novels to be published. For my novels, that means I have to finish them, edit them, and edit them some more. That's why I am participating in National Novel Writing Month again this year. I'm writing 50,000 words or more in 30 days.

And that's why I might not post as often during the month of November. I won't be gone though, and I will try and still update from time to time, or I will share interesting news I find on Skinny Dreaming's Facebook page.

I am giving this goal the same persistence that I gave to losing weight and getting healthy. It's only day 8 of the challenge and I have already written 28,546 words. (This novel might be a bit longer than a mere 50,000 words by the time it is finished.)

If you have a goal, a dream you want to achieve, stop dreaming about it and start reaching for it!

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Seven Tips For Eating Healthy On Halloween

For those of us trying to keep an eye on our waistlines, Halloween can be a real nightmare. We are expected to buy lots of Halloween sweets and treats to hand out. Hopefully, we have enough trick-or-treaters to hand it all out and not be stuck with a bunch of extra temptation in the house, but if we have kids of our own, chances are that they will be bringing home buckets of sugary loot too. How are we supposed to eat healthy while surrounded by so much sweet temptation?

1. Hand out something other than sweets. You could hand out toothbrushes, but that might not be nearly as fun for kids. You could hand out coloring books, crayons, pencils, spider rings, or other Halloween party favors. You could hand out magnets or buttons. These are things that kids will enjoy without rotting their teeth, and there won't be any sweets left calling to your sweet tooth.



2. Throw yourself into decorating for the holiday. Keep yourself busy with making decoratons, hanging decorations and making your home look spooky to keep your mind off of the treats in your house. Bonus, you might be burning off some calories while clmibing laddders, reaching to hang things and pulling fake cobwebs across the ceiling.

3. Keep the sweets out of sight until you need them to hand out. Also keep the loot your children bring home out of sight until they have worked their way through it. Out of sight, out of mind, hopefully. Your kids don't need candy any more than you do, so try and limit how much they eat a time. Maybe give them a piece or two in their lunchboxes until it is gone.

4. Keep a lot of healthy snack food on hand. Chopped carrots or celery with a healthy dip is a quick and easy thing to have available when you get the urge to munch. In order to battle a craving for something sweet, have some fresh strawberries or raspberries available.

5. Drink plenty of water. Sometimes thirst can cause us to mistakenly think we are hungry, so make sure you are full up with water in order to prevent this from happening.

6. Have a healthy and filling dinner before all of the trick-or-treaters start arriving. Again, if you feel full and well satisfied, you are less likely to give in to the urge for one of those candy temptations.

7. Give in a tiny bit to temptation. Sometimes, giving yourself a taste of what you want will help to satisfy the craving. A small treat once in a while is not going to be the end of your healthy eating and is not likely to cause any weight gain, as long as it doesn't become something you do often.

Relax and enjoy the holiday day and have a happy Halloween!

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Guest Posting at "Where Are My Knees?"

Today I have a guest post over at the blog Where Are My Knees? I tell my story again and also give some advice for those of you who are still struggling to lose weight. The ladies over at Where Are My Knees have a great blog full of inspirational stories, recipes and advice, so go and check them out!

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Why You Shouldn't Wait For Motivation

Since losing over 10 stone, I often hear people say, "I wish I had your motivation." Often, I read a lament on Facebook about how someone "can't get motivated." Over and over, people claim they are waiting for motivation before losing weight, and I just have to speak up.

Stop waiting for motivation! If you really want to lose weight, then lose it! If you are tired of being overweight, then take the steps necessary to become healthier and lose your excess fat. And stop moaning about your lack of motivation!

None of us lack motivation. Motivation is just a combination of the reasons you have for losing weight. It is the rewards you expect to gain when you lose the weight.

When I was 10 stone overweight, I had plenty of motivation to lose the weight. It hurt to walk. I had health problems developing. I had seven children who relied on me and needed me to be healthy and energetic for them. I lacked energy. I hated the way I looked. And this list of motivators goes on. And yet, all of this motivation to lose weight did not start me losing weight. I was morbidly obese for over a decade.

It wasn't until I began taking the steps towards losing the weight (like joining Slimming World, keeping a food diary and exercising) and going through the necessary actions that any of my drive to lose weight started coming into play. The more I ate healthy and exercised, the more weight I started to lose, the more drive I found to continue with it.

So stop moaning about your lack of motivation. If you really want to lose weight, then you will do something about it. No more saying you just can't do it because you can't find the motivation. If it's important to you, you are capable of making it happen.


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Treading Water

Wondering why I called this post "Treading Water?" Am I going to be writing about a new swimming exercise or some fascinating aspect of water that helps with weight loss. Well, no.

Treading water is, metaphorically speaking, what I am doing right now. You know what I mean, right? You do the same thing over and over, and even though it is the same thing that you do so easily in the beginning, it begins to get harder and more difficult to keep doing it. Currently, that's me.

I am still eating healthy, and I am still exercising a lot, but my results are not coming as easily. It seems to be getting more difficult to maintain my weight loss. I am not binge eating. I am not having lots of fatty and unhealthy fare. I am not eating out. I am cooking healthy nutritious meals. I have even started watching my portions.

But despite all of this, my weight has been creeping upwards. I am up about ten pounds and it doesn't seem to want to come off. I have no idea what changes I need to make to bring my weight back down because I am doing everything I am supposed to do. I am staying focused.

I am not giving up because it is not in my nature to give up, but I am frustrated.

Of course, this was all something I could have posted about last week. This week, I actually haven't been eating enough, not because I thought it would help me lose weight or anything daft like that but because I had a toothache and eating anything at all caused me a lot of pain. I've been to the dentist now, and my tooth pain should be gone in a few days.

But not eating enough over this week of pain has caused my weight to go up a few more pounds. I feel like crying, but I'll get over it.

Reebok has said that they will replace my crosstrainer and even give me an upgrade, as my case is such a special one, to a crosstrainer that has not had any complaints. It won't be here for another two weeks though. Maybe getting my crosstrainer back will help with my weight. I hope so (mainly because I am oh-so-tired of running up and down the stairs of my three story house while carrying handweights. I am not graceful, so I will be lucky if I don't end up breaking something while doing this particular exercise!)

I am not feeling sorry for myself (okay, maybe a little). I know the added pounds will eventually come back off. I'm frustrated and fairly angry at my body right now though. (Who knew my body had a mind of its own and was as stubborn as, well, me?)

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Another Broken Elliptical Crosstrainer & A Challenge To The Manufacturers

My elliptical crosstrainer BROKE again! This is number EIGHT! I've had this one since April. I can now officially say that I do NOT recommend Reebok crosstrainers. I do not believe that companies build them to last for people who actually use them, and I challenge any company to prove me wrong.

The challenge is this: If you believe that your elliptical crosstrainer is of a sufficient construction to hold up with regular daily use (an hour to two hours of use a day, everyday), then send it to me. I will use it and do an initial blog about the features of it that I like and or don't like. I will do another blog post on it after 6 months, if it makes it that long without breaking down, to update everyone on how well it is or isn't holding up. I will do another blog post after a year, if it lasts that long. I will even do a third blog post after two years' time, if it is still functioning at that time.

However, if it is as weak and breakable as all of the rest that I have used, I will lambast it in my blog as a useless piece of rubbish.

I like machines that tell me calories burned based on my weight, distance covered, and that allow me to increase or decrease the resistance.

I am not a large person. I weigh, on any given day, between 125 and 135 lbs. I am 5' 2" tall, and my weight and size should not have an adverse effect on how well or poorly the machine works.

I am really just fed up with my exercise machine breaking down. Reebok has been good enough to replace them as they break, but I end up having to go weeks, and once a whole month, without a working machine in the meantime. And on top of that, each replacement machine has to be ASSEMBLED, which I hate doing.


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Inspirational Quotes for Reaching Your Weight Loss Goals

I have assembled some inspirational quotes about achieving our dreams, reaching for our goals and succeeding at weight loss, including some quotes from my own blog posts, here to help you when you need a bit of a boost in your motivation. Enjoy!



"Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world." ~Harriet Tubman

“Begin doing what you want to do now. We are not living in eternity. We have only this moment, sparkling like a star in our hand – and melting like a snow flake” - M.B. Ray

"Reach high, for stars lie hidden in your soul. Dream deep, for every dream precedes the goal." ~Pamela Vaull Starr

"Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined." ~Henry David Thoreau

"Next time you hear the voice of your inner critic, remember that your inner critic LIES, and try replacing that inner voice with a new one, one that encourages you and helps you to believe in your own worth." ~Rebecca Fyfe

"There are some people who live in a dream world, and there are some who face reality; and then there are those who turn one into the other." ~Douglas Everett

"So often times it happens that we live our lives in chains
And we never even know we have the key." ~Lyrics from Already Gone, peformed by the Eagles for their 1974 On the Border album

"You cannot dream yourself into a character: you must hammer and forge yourself into one." ~Henry D. Thoreau

"Today is the day to choose. Choose to live longer. Choose to have more energy. Choose the be strong and capable. Choose to stop putting things off. Choose to be healthy." ~Rebecca Fyfe

"The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams." ~Eleanor Roosevelt

"Commitment leads to action. Action brings your dream closer." ~Marcia Wieder

"The best way to make your dreams come true is to wake up." ~Paul Valery

"#1 excuse for not following your dream -"I don't have time." Suggestion: Look at the unecessary things that do take up your time and replace them with things that help your dream. Never give up!" ~Rebecca Fyfe

"Life is like a game of cards. The hand that is dealt you represents determinism; the way you play it is free will." ~Jawaharal Nehru

"Believe with all of your heart that you will do what you were made to do." ~Orison Swett Marden

"Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Willing is not enough; we must do." ~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

"Anything is possible is you are willing to take the necessary steps to make it happen. Focus on your goals and you can make them real!" ~Rebecca Fyfe

"We are still masters of our fate. We are still captains of our souls." ~Winston Churchill

""We should be taught not to wait for inspiration to start a thing. Action always generates inspiration. Inspiration seldom generates action." ~Frank Tibolt

“Life is full of beauty. Notice it. Notice the bumble bee, the small child, and the smiling faces. Smell the rain, and feel the wind. Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams.” ~Ashley Smith

"The only things that stand in the way of your dreams becoming a reality are the limits you place on yourself." ~Rebecca Fyfe

"Take care of your body with steadfast fidelity. The soul must see through these eyes alone, and if they are dim, the whole world is clouded." ~Johann Goethe

"Believe - even when it is not rational and good things will happen." ~anonymous

"If you have a dream, you have to believe, with every fiber of your being, that you can achieve it, and then you have to do the work it takes to make it a reality." ~Rebecca Fyfe

"We have the power to shrink our dreams to fit reality or the power to stretch our reality to fit our dreams." ~anonymous

"There is no authentic goal you can set for yourself that can't be reached, no dream that can't be realized. It's just a matter of learning HOW to achieve what you want." ~Jillian Michaels

"Whatever stage you are at in your weight loss goals, whether you are just starting out, halfway there or already at your goal weight, know that you are beautiful NOW." ~Rebecca Fyfe

"Whatever you do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius and power and magic in it." ~Johann Goethe

"My advice is, never do tomorrow what you can do today. Procrastination is the thief of time." ~Charles Dickens

"Weight loss is ALL about figuring out your weaknesses, modifying and rolling with the punches. If you stumble, get back up and dust yourself off." ~Kayecee Spain

"Diet schmiet. Feed it good food, give it fun and exercise, & your body loves you." ~Barbara Mack

"The difference between a successful person & others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack in will." ~ V.Lombardi

"Losing weight is not your life’s work. Your life’s work is to love, to serve, to be honest, to develop personal integrity, to be kind, to raise healthy children, to grow spiritually, to adore yourself. Which is not to say you can’t choose to shed some excess baggage. You’ll just do it with a sense of perspective." ~Lisa Turner

"Impossible" is just an opinion." ~ Paulo Coelho

"Get rid of that negative little voice in your head that whispers to you that you can’t do it, you’re not strong enough, it’s too hard and all of the other negative words. Just ignore it. You know, deep down, that you can achieve your dreams, so follow that deeper inner voice and believe in yourself." ~Rebecca Fyfe





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We Need To Be Healthy For Our Kids

I wrote this for Beverly Hills Child Magazine and it was originally published in the January 2011 issue.



There are many benefits to being healthy and physically fit. Most of us are aware of how our being healthy benefits ourselves. We know that exercise helps to keep our heart strong and prevent heart disease. We know that weight bearing exercise helps to strengthen our muscles and that more muscle mass increases our metabolism. We know that maintaining a healthy body mass index and not letting ourselves get overweight helps prevent diseases such as diabetes, high blood pressure, heart failure and a host of other health problems. We know that strong bones help our posture and that strong stomach muscles can help prevent back pain. We know that being physically fit means we will have more energy than if we were heavy or out of shape. We know that eating healthy food like vegetables and other fresh produce helps prevent certain cancers.

There are a myriad of health benefits to maintaining a healthy weight, eating a healthy diet and getting a moderate amount of daily exercise. And we know about these benefits. Newspaper headlines shout about these benefits to us regularly. Television newscasts inform us of these benefits almost daily. We already know.

But parents are busy people, and often we ignore these warnings about diseases that being overweight can cause. Often we ignore the headlines that tell us to eat fresh produce every day. What some of us don’t understand is that when we ignore these articles, like the ones that tell us we should exercise to help prevent heart disease, we are being completely selfish.

Selfish sounds like such a harsh word. But it fits. Letting ourselves be overweight and unfit, eating fatty, sugar-laden food, sitting watching television instead of going out for a walk, all of those things are selfish acts for parents to do. How is it that doing something that is normally seen as only harmful to ourselves can be called selfish? It’s selfish because our lives are no longer our own once we have children.

By not taking care of our bodies, all kinds of things can happen. We can become more prone to injuries and illnesses. Our children need us to be able to take care of them, and that is very difficult to do if we’ve got injuries that keep us from walking easily, or keep getting sick and have trouble getting out of bed.

We can develop chronic diseases. These can be really frightening for our children to see in us, their parents. If Daddy goes into a diabetic coma, his daughter is going to cry and worry and miss him until he is okay, and then she will continue to worry that it might happen again. If Mommy faints because her blood pressure is too high, her son is going to cry and worry and miss her until she is okay, and then he will continue to worry that it might happen again. The safety he once felt will be gone.

We will have less energy. Anyone with small children knows how difficult it can be to keep up with them when all you want to do is sleep. We need all the energy we can find to keep up with our children and to have the patience that they so often require from us. Many of us will have less patience when we are tired. And many of us will be less able to concentrate when we are tired. And children are incredibly inventive at getting into trouble when parents are too tired to be patient or to concentrate fully.

We can die. It is silly to think that playing fire with our health will only affect ourselves. Any child who has lost a parent will tell you that he was never the same again. Our children need us to be in their lives. They need us to give them love and hugs. They need us to help them with homework. They need us to encourage them, to teach them, to listen to them, to talk to them, to just be there for them, always. They need us to live.

We also need to be an example for our children. Our children need to see us being healthy. They learn more from what we do than from what we say. If they see us eating fast food and sitting in front of the television most of the time, then that is what they will learn to do. If instead, they see us eating fresh fruit and going for a walk every day, then they will learn that from us.

It is selfish of us to live an unhealthy lifestyle. By living an unhealthy lifestyle, by letting ourselves remain overweight and unfit, we are harming our children. This is a new year, a time for new beginnings. So let’s start this new year by making a promise to make sure that we are living a healthy lifestyle for our children. We owe it to them.



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11 Weight Loss Tips

I have posted tips for weight loss before, so I may be repeating things I have said before, but this is just off the top of my head (in answer to someone who asked me for some tips). I thought, since I was typing up some quick tips anyway, I would add them here too.

1 - Limit your breads and cereals.

2 - Switch to whole grain breads, pastas, rices and such.

3 - Make sure your meats are lean. If frying, "dry fry" using Fry Light or some other low-calorie oil spray.

4 - Eat lots and lots and lots of fruit and vegetables throughout the day and with meals. Make sure that you dinner plate is 1/3 full of vegetables with each meal.

5 - Snack on things like fat-free yogurt, eggs, and fruit salad.

6 - Limit your "treats" to somewhere between 200 and 300 calories a day.

7 - Find time to exercise. Maybe it's walking while your baby is being pushed in the stroller, or maybe it's working out to an exercise video when your child naps or after your partner gets home - but find the time.

8 - Avoid high sugar drinks such as soda (diet is okay) and fruit juice.

9 - Most of your recipes that call for sugar can have the amount of sugar cut by 1/3 without affecting the taste.

10 - Replace sugar with sweetener when possible.

11 - Don't give up! You can do it! Just believe in yourself!

And, for an extra tip - You could always join Slimming World like I did.

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Hiking Up The Wrong Mountain

You might think that the above title of this post is a metaphor, and I'm sure I could come up with some profound post using it as such. But it's not. Today, my husband Robert, my daughter Angelica and I really did hike up the wrong mountain.

To be fair, I didn't know, at the beginning of the walk, that I was even going to be hiking up any mountain, let alone the wrong mountain. My husband suggested we walk our dog Mercury to a park with a lake that was only about 2 miles away. I should have realized that there would be more to our walk than that though, because he bought me some new hiking shoes just a couple of days ago.





As we passed the park, my husband said, "I fancy walking up there," and he pointed to what appeared to be a group of trees at the top of a very distant mountain. "It's Barbury Castle," he told Angelica and me. Seeing the look of apprehension cross my face, he tried to assure me, "It's not as far as it looks. You know that we always walk to places that look like they are a long way off and find out that they are not really that far."

I thought about my new shoes and how they were already rubbing my feet the wrong way (as new shoes tend to do), and then I thought about how many times in the past my husband had mentioned wanting to hike to Barbury Castle. I sighed internally and began the treck with my husband, my 18 year old daughter and our border collie.

The trip was all uphill and mostly in rough terrain, both dirt and long grass. And today was blisteringly hot. I had expected to be rained on and had not been prepared (meaning I hadn't put any sunblock on my fair skin) for the hot sun that shone on us during the entire hike.

We'd never hiked to Barbury Castle before. Angelica mentioned that she really would love to have a cold drink and something to eat, so Robert pointed to another little group of trees that were a short distance away from the place we were heading and told her that there was a cafeteria there where we would stop. We knew that Mercury would need some water by then too.

We saw lots of rabbits, horses, squirrels and other wildlife along the way. There were also fields of wheat. It really was a beautiful hike. I had my mobile phone with me, so I used it to take some pictures during our hike.













When we finally reached the top of the mountain and the place where Barbury Castle should have been, we found out that we had hiked up the wrong mountain. We had, instead, reached the Liddington Castle hill fort. Barbury Castle was on another mountain. We could see it from where we stood. There was a dial showing us the different direction of the various local sights and it pointed out which direction Barbury Castle was from us. Angelica was not pleased.



But we had her take some photos of us there at the top, and we took some of her too.











We may not have been at the location of Barbury Castle, but there was a moat.



There was no cafeteria for us to stop in at. There was no food for Angelica to fill her tummy with and no cold drinks for us. On our way back though, Mercury found a water trough for horses and drank his fill. At one point, we wound up stuck in a field surrounded by a barbed wire fence and had to carefully climb over it and then lift our dog over it too.

We got to see a horse with one blue eye and one brown eye.





We did manage to stop at a gas station when we were most of the way home. I had a Diet Coke, Robert had a Cherry Coke and a Starbar, and Angelica had a Coke and a Starbar. (Robert bought me a Starbar too, but I brought mine home and tucked it away in my Syn Tin for eating when I have enough syns available.)

When we got home, we looked our hike up on Google maps and found out that, all in all, we had hiked 10.25 miles. I was sunburned and tired, but the walk had been an enjoyable one. It was good to know that I could do the hike. There was a time in my overweight past when a hike like today's would have been beyond my ability.

And there you have it; sometimes hiking up the wrong mountain can be a pleasant experience and can teach you something about yourself.

Of course, Robert still wants to hike to Barbury Castle.


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Body Image & Battling My Inner Critic

You would think that, after having spent years being morbidly obese and then finally, finally, being slim again, I would be thrilled with my new body and wouldn't have a complaint about any part of it. I mean, really, can't I be happy that I look and feel so much better now than I did when I weighed more than twice what I weigh now? Shouldn't losing 145 pounds make me feel really good about what I now see in the mirror?

But nothing is ever simple or easy, and even though I am an advocate of girls and women feeling good about themselves, believing in themsleves and in their own, natural beauty no matter what shape, size, age or color they may be, I still find myself being very critical of my own appearance.

I have been asked before about loose skin since losing so much weight, and I will answer honestly by saying, yes, there is some loose skin. It's not a lot of loose skin and it's not as bad as it was in the beginning. The more time I spend at or near my target weight, the more the loose skin firms up. But I still find myself looking at it and feeling unhappy with it. Loose skin in my belly area, boobs that have lost their fullness, and a bit of loose skin on my upper arms; it all makes me sometimes feel less than lovely.

Then there are the signs of age. I spent my 20s and most of my 30s being so overweight that any wrinkles that were beginning to appear were hidden in layers of fat. Now that the fat is gone, my crow's feet and laugh lines are showing. The skin on my neck is not as smooth as it once was. My forehead has creases that were not there before I gained all of that weight. My red hair is much thinner now than it used to be, and tiny strands of white are beginning to appear in it.

But I am trying and striving to silence that inner critic, the one that tells me I will never be pretty enough or thin enough or young enough. Because I used to hear her, that inner voice telling me I'm not good enough, all of those years ago when I was young and thin and had never been overweight, when my hair was thick and shiny without a strand of grey. She used to speak to me when I was a young girl and a teen, and strangely enough, despite my youth, despite the terrific figure I had back then, she still told me I wasn't pretty enough or good enough or thin enough. And this is how I know that my inner critic lies.

So I fight her. And there are beginning to be more and more days when I win against her, when I feel good about myself and even feel pretty. There are days when I don't fight her hard enough, but I am finding that, the older I get, the less I hear that voice. She's still there, whispering in my mind and hidden behind my own thoughts sometimes, but I am able to ignore her more often. I even find myself replacing her with a new voice, one that tells me I am more than good enough. And I am finding that I like this new inner voice much better.

Next time you hear the voice of your inner critic, remember that your inner critic lies, and try replacing her voice with a new one, one that encourages you and helps you to believe in your own worth.



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